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At Aulis

by Coalspur

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1.
You said that you were untouched by the rose red hands of dawn, and that Night was eternal in your heart. You said you were haunted by a phantom, and I knew I was haunted by it too. That's when I moved closer to your soul. Your eyes became windows to your heart. It was such beautiful dream when you opened your eyes and felt as if you'd never been hurt, as if you had never known strife. It was like no one had ever hurt you, and everything was still beautiful. You were not waiting to die; you were still waiting to live. But you have to wake up, you need to open your eyes and bit by bit lose your soul in every living breath. I can never make this home for you. You have to make your bed, lay down and close your eyes. And when you wake remember where you had laid to rest. You close your eyes and hope that sleep will come fast, and you won't remember waking fears in sleep, and sleeping fears when you re-awake.
2.
Bury the cross in the dirt but keep its heart. Tear out all the pages, husk and chaff. Don't you ever tell me how to live, but don't you cover your ears to my words. Cover the stigmata, you know better on your own. Why be a joke in his presence, when you can hope in his absence? You are alone but I won't tell, that you feel the space between. I cannot step in the same river even once, but you dip your foot in the water and walk away.
3.
You will not feel alone when you fly on out and feel as high as God. You will not fall back into an ice bath. The haunting isolation and all the needless space between you and someone else will be filled with amorous want and self-worth you will become a united and meaningful whole. Your appetites fulfilled, questions answered, other made same. You want to reach out and be touched, to cry out and be heard. You want to reach out and be held to speak up and be understood.
4.
Winds stopped and silent, the soothsayer speaks of terrible choices. Fates and failures lined up side-by-side. The terrible and the beautiful juxtapose but never coalesce. They say that she was silent and accepted her fate, and was wet by all of their libations. But you can feel her fear, you can know that the moisture that rolled down her face was hopeless and defeated tears.

credits

released March 3, 2012

Written by Dan Cook, Will Kujala and Brady Dryer.
Recorded by Dan Cook.
Mastered by Jack Shirley of Atomic Garden Studios.
Limited Edition Tape released by Northern Haunt Records.

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Coalspur Edmonton, Alberta

EDMO

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